...my blog title.
Well, if you know me at all, you would know that I have a serious infatuation with a little band called Dashboard Confessional. For some reason those boys just do the trick for me every time and have marked major moments and events in my life.
I'm a biiiiig memory attacher, to anything really...smells, certain clothes, songs, places, sounds... I attach. I don't feel this is unusual, I actually kind of like it about myself. It's like I give myself dejavu on purpose, little flags in my mind of things I enjoyed previously...hmm, yes.
Moving on, my blog title. There have been many a days, like today, when I just put on Dashboard, sit on my bed or outside, with my journal and a pen and just think, let it sink, and respond. There is a particular song, The Best Deceptions, that was inspirational enough at the time to redeem the honor of titling this little chunk of cyberspace that I call my own.
I guess it just struck a cord in me to break out, speak out and act out. The best line, hands down is "Don't you see, don't you see that the charade is over? And all the best deceptions and the clever cover story awards go to you." I guess it just woke me up a little bit, dusted off my consciousness and kicked it into gear. Its actually what got me thinking about starting to blog. DB is pretty inspirational like that (the crazy passion in his voice helped a bit as well). It has a way of pinching my heart and waking it up long enough to realize I've been standing still too long, and that I need to move.
I suppose the best way to put it is that in my life, the charade is over... and its time to be real. Which is the type of thing I will try to convey through this blog.
So, now you know.
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Friday, December 26, 2008
Feast your eyes...and mind.
One of my favorite gifts this Christmas was from my sister and brother in law, A Lifetime of Secrets by Frank Warren.
In this book lies the most intimate secrets of hundreds of anonymous postcards that were sent in, and compiled into this profound and thoughtprovoking piece of literature.
Its the ultimate coffee table book and I get so inspired and touched every time my eyes glaze over the creative and raw images and thoughts. I would highly encourage you to pick up a copy or at least browse it the next time you find yourself in a bookstore.
It's weird, I feel a sense of invasion of privacy while reading it. I am discovering hundreds of secrets that have been kept deep inside the hearts of so many strangers. I feel oddly close to them because by them revealing just one secret, I feel as if I've been let into their life, just a little.
Sunday, December 21, 2008
home sweet stinkin home...
Oh heavens, being home is (gonna sound cliche) marvelousss.
I have done nothing but had coffee, family and friend love time, and a constant state of the shivers for the entirety of the two days I've been home. And if this is any indication of what the rest of my break is going to consist of, I would not at ALL be opposed to that.
I got to hold and play with my ridiculously fantastic nephew as he fell asleep in my arms while the whole fam and I ate cookies and watched the original Miracle on 34th Street.
My room is already a disaster and I havn't even been here long enough for it to even feel lived in yet. My clothes are already scattered about in every possible corner and available surface. I already leave things in different rooms an forget to pick them up for hours on end. I already have about 5 dishes in the sink and am out of face wash. I love being home, I am always truly and completely comfortable here.
Let the festivities begin...Christmas is around the cornerrrr :)
I have done nothing but had coffee, family and friend love time, and a constant state of the shivers for the entirety of the two days I've been home. And if this is any indication of what the rest of my break is going to consist of, I would not at ALL be opposed to that.
I got to hold and play with my ridiculously fantastic nephew as he fell asleep in my arms while the whole fam and I ate cookies and watched the original Miracle on 34th Street.
Legitimately perfection.
My room is already a disaster and I havn't even been here long enough for it to even feel lived in yet. My clothes are already scattered about in every possible corner and available surface. I already leave things in different rooms an forget to pick them up for hours on end. I already have about 5 dishes in the sink and am out of face wash. I love being home, I am always truly and completely comfortable here.
Let the festivities begin...Christmas is around the cornerrrr :)
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
"My business is to create"
"All I know is that if you don't figure out something, you'll just stay ordinary.
And it doesn't matter if its a work of art, or a taco or a pair of socks, just create something new. And there it is, and its you, outside of you and in the world. And you can look at it, or hear it, or read it, or feel it and you know a little bit more about you, a little bit more than anybody else does."
Oh, P.S. I Love You...you get me every time. Last night in a serious after finals crash and burn session, which included chocolate eating, The OC (season 4) watching and sweatpants...I was really struck by this quote. Maybe its the fact that I have been overworked and undersleeped lately, but this made a lot of since to me and resonated in my little growing artist's heart.
This part of the movie is when she is in Ireland, wandering around in this beautiful countryside and then just spills her heart out to a total (attractive) stranger and is word-vomiting all over the place. She reminded me a lot of myslef. Overexpressive, colorful, loud, wordy, and a little lost. It was oddly comforting when I heard the lines above because I've been feeling a little uneasy about art these days. I feel like almost every day I question if it's right for me. But it helped to have some encouragement from the Lord, even if it was through a cheesy but awesome chick flick, God knows me well, and knows exactly what to use to reach me...he's super clever.
Well, this is my last blog of the semester...I am now a second semester college sophomore. When did that happen? God has been so good to me these past few months and has guided me and changed me in ways I had no idea were possible. I feel blessed to be where I am, and to have the experiences and life lessons that I'm having and learning. And even though the details may be a bit fuzzy, both now and in the future, I know that God is soverign and has a way better plan than I do. I'm on board.
Now, I'm gonna make a playlist or two, pack (almost) all my earthly belongings in the back of my jeep and make the long trek home. Please be praying for safe travels with all this pre-white Christmas business.
Monday, December 15, 2008
No lie, funnest weekend of college career thus far.
I know, HUGE statement right?
Well, I'm pretty sure it's all the way true.
This weekend was phenom.
Well, I'm pretty sure it's all the way true.
This weekend was phenom.
FRIDAY!
We skipped on over to a Hollywood Hills mansion for a private art show put on by a 4-D Design art class from Biola. A few of my close friends were in it and it was SO good, serious talent.
Also, this little soiree was made complete with the DJ from Black Eyed Peas giving us musical enjoyment for the evening...so funny and random. So, that whole night was delightful and cluttered with picture taking, dress wearing, art appreciating, laughing and dancing.
And possibly the funnest part was walking a mile up hill on a horribly paved road in heels...so awkward and funny.
SATURDAY!
GYRAD (Get Your Roommate A Date) on my floor in my dorm. We did every stereotypical group date activity possible but it was actually really great. Everything from, photo scavenger hunt to In-n-Out, to a Christmas light show, to Pazookie's, to playing Apples to Apples for hours on end. Fantaaastic. It was even more special because my date was one of my very best guy friends is LEAVING next semester, so this was a great last night of memories. Oh man, I havn't laughed as hard as I did that night in a ridiculoulsy long time...
SUNDAY!
Was our last Mosaic (my church, that I LOVE) outting of the semester, so we had to go out with a bang. We tried to do everything the same way we always do, but just better because it was the last time we we would ever do it! It was a super pleasant afternoon, especially because we had our last Sunday brunch all together, very bittersweet.
And then Sunday night we celebrated my Angela's birthday by taking her to a suprise location. We went to Veronese, a precious and ecclectic tea house where we enjoyed tea, crepes and each others company.
We were going for American Gothic...naturally.
Well, as all things do...this fantastic weekend has come to a close. Now its time to open my books so I can get my finals outta the way and make the long snowy journey home to Oregon.
Readyyy? Go.
Friday, December 12, 2008
Last one, I promise.
For some reason (probably because I might not pass this course) I decided it would be a good idea to spend quadruple the amount of time on this paper as I did on my previous two.
Hopefully this little guy will befriend one of the happier letters of the alphabet, one of the two towards the beginning, when he ends up in the grade book.
It's a chunker, so don't be alarmed...but I learned a whole heck of a lot writing it so hopefully you'll learn a bit, and agree with most of it.
Readyyyy? Go.
Hopefully this little guy will befriend one of the happier letters of the alphabet, one of the two towards the beginning, when he ends up in the grade book.
It's a chunker, so don't be alarmed...but I learned a whole heck of a lot writing it so hopefully you'll learn a bit, and agree with most of it.
Readyyyy? Go.
I believe:
The person of Christ is fully and completely divine (John 1:1, Col 1:15) and fully and completely human (John 1:14, Col 1:19, 2:9). The divine and human natures are distinctive from one another yet are not separate. These two distinct natures remain wholly united in one person (Heb 1:3, Isa 9:6, Gal 4:4-5). The deity of Christ is displayed through the authoritative nature his of his speech, (Matt 7:28-29, 5:18, 24:35) as well as the intimate relationship he expressed with God the Father (Luke 4:29, Mark 14:36) Also when Christ refers to himself as ‘Son of Man’ and accepts worship (John 20:28, Matt 28:17, John 9:38) it emphasizes his own deity (Dan. 7:13-14, Mark 2:27-28, Matt 16:15) As a result of the implications of Christ’s deity I can now posses authentic knowledge of God (John 1:18, John 14:9) and understand that redemption is possible and attainable (1 Tim 2:5, John 3:16). Christ’s deity, omnipotent power and endless wisdom and love are worthy of my continuous praise (Heb 1:3, 4:15-16, Matt 14:33).
The humanity of Christ is made evident through his virgin conception and human birth, (Gal 4:4, Luke 1:35, 2:7, Isa 9:6) proving that salvation can come only from the Lord. Jesus has a human body, which grew in both wisdom and physique (Luke 2:40, 2:52). He endured hunger, thirst and exhaustion among other physical constraints (Matt 4:2, Luke 23:26, John 19:34). His bodily form was acknowledged and accepted (Matt 4:23-25, 1 John 1:1) both before and after the resurrection (Luke 24:39, 42-43, John 20:25-27) and his body will remain in this form eternally (Luke 24:50-51, Acts 1:9-11), existing permanently through perfect divinity and humanity (Heb 7:25, 1 Cor 15:8, Rev 1:13). Christ shares the same mind as that of humanity (Mark 13:22, Luke 2:52, Heb 5:8-9) and was tempted by the same sins (Luke 4:1-2, Heb 4:15), but did not succumb to them (John 8:46, 1 John 3:5). Jesus had the desire for a religious lifestyle and sought fellowship and disciplines of prayer, scripture reading, meditation synagogue visits (Mark 1:35, 6:45-46, Luke 6:12). The humanity of Christ is crucial to my understanding of his nature because Jesus’ death acted as a substitute sacrifice for the atonement of sin (Heb 2:17, Col 1:19) and became the mediator between God and humanity (1Tim 2:5). This incarnation was necessary so he could act in sympathy as our high priest having experienced the fullness of finitude (Heb 2:18, 4:15).
Jesus Christ is the true and blameless prophet (Deut 18:14-22, Matt 21:46, Luke 7:16). His words are irrefutable, divine and God-breathed (John 1:14, 6:14). Christ is the complete and faultless priest (Rom 5:19, 2 Cor 5:21). His life’s work stems from his life of obedience and righteousness, which atones for the lives of the disobedient and unrighteous (Phil 3:9). Christ intercedes for us and prays on our behalf, presenting us to God according to his will (Rom 8:34, Rom 11:2, Acts 25:24). Christ’s sacrifice of atonement was perfect because it fully removed sins that the OT sacrifices could not (Heb 10:1, Micah 6:6-8, Heb 10:4). The death of Christ accomplished the redemption of human sin and divine purpose (Acts 2:23, 4:27-28), because he took our place his intercession for us is eternal and successful (Rev 5:9-11). Christ is the pure and holy king and rules over all nature and all people, defending, protecting and shepherding them according to his will (Rev 5:9-10, 1 Tim 2:11-12, Col 1:17). As the prophet, priest and king, Christ’s work is presented in stages of humility and exaltation. His glory prior to being incarnate, (John 17:5, 24, 2 Cor 8:9), his incarnation (John 1:14, 2 Cor 8:9, Phil 2:6), earthly life (Matt 8:20, Mark 10:45, John 1:10-11), and death (Phil 2:8, Acts 3:15) are all vital components in Christ’s humiliation. The exaltation of Christ follows in his resurrection (1 Cor 15:12), ascension (1 Tim 3:16), being seated at the right hand of God (Matt 26:64, Acts 2:33), second coming and reign into the millennium (Phil 2:10-11) and His eternal glory (Rev 5:9-10, 12).
You alright?
I hope so.
It's a LOT to take in when you have to state all your beliefs of Christ in one measly page.
But basically Christ is ridiculously and insanely incredible.
That's all you really need to know.
I hope so.
It's a LOT to take in when you have to state all your beliefs of Christ in one measly page.
But basically Christ is ridiculously and insanely incredible.
That's all you really need to know.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Next Stop: Crazy.
Today I am running on 3 hours of sleep, half a bagel and Christmas spirit.
I spent 8 hours last night with one of my fave classmates, writing a 1 page paper... ONE PAGE. Hence, next stop: crazy. Considering I only spent about an hour tops on the previous two papers, I guess we both figured it was time to step it up a notch...or 6. The dilemma with this paper was we had to summarize ALL our beliefs on Christ and dumb it down to short sentences and back each one up with biblical reference...gross. But I learned a whole heck of a lot and hopefully that will pay off, both in the grade book and in the long run.I've gotta go take a nap or two and start/finish my final presentation for my drawing class in a few hours. But until then, I will survive of the Christmas cheer I developed in Christmas chapel today...mmm, delicious.
Monday, December 8, 2008
Thanks for being born Frangela.
Shout out time!
I would like to dedicate this blog to my roommate and one of my best friends:
Angela Marie Blake (pictured above).
She is so silly and fantastic and fills my life with so much joy! Who would've thought that when we first met (on fbook, so silly) before even attending Biola, that we would be such close friends! God is so good and I am so blessed to have this little lady in my life, and my room...haha.Angela Marie Blake (pictured above).
As I banged my way around our room in the dark this morning putting up (lame, but also kinda awesome) birthday posters I had made for her last night, I didn't mind that I kept stubbing my toes and running into things, because today she is super cool and has been alive for 20 years, come on...that's pretty neat! Even though I have only known her 2 of these 20 years, I think she's pretty great. And I will continue to appreciate her today as we get a group together and all go out tonight and again next week with our group of girls for our last hurrah of the semester!
Happy Birthday Frange! Love youuu :)
And in other news, I bought two (much anticipated) flannel shirts today, and it has been the semi-highlight of my week so far. Yes they were $5 and yes they were discovered in the little boys department....shhhh. I have had a love for this blessed fabric for years and it has finally weaseled its way into my apparel, touche flannel, touche.
In other OTHER news, I will be returning home in exactly 11 days, a 15 minute art presentation, 10 verse meditations, two exams, and one final design piece from NOW. Yessss. I may need a Diet Coke IV permanently inserted in my veins to do it...but it's gonna happen, I want to be a mindless motionless zombie sooo bad (aka what I will be the first 3 or so days of Christmas break).
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Knitting and Naps.
I have come to the realization that I am slowly but surely becoming an old woman.
1. Its only 12:15 and I have already taken two naps today.
2. I have a craving to get more cardigans.
3. I'm asking for knitting needles and yarn for Christmas because of my desire to learn how to knit.
4. I left my glasses at home and have been getting headaches every day without them.
5. I keep just wanting to sit around and drink tea and think about home.
Crap...80 yrs old here I come.
Also, I love this quote, which I found on a wall in the Colosseum in Rome and have loved it ever since. So thanks Plato...
1. Its only 12:15 and I have already taken two naps today.
2. I have a craving to get more cardigans.
3. I'm asking for knitting needles and yarn for Christmas because of my desire to learn how to knit.
4. I left my glasses at home and have been getting headaches every day without them.
5. I keep just wanting to sit around and drink tea and think about home.
Crap...80 yrs old here I come.
Also, I love this quote, which I found on a wall in the Colosseum in Rome and have loved it ever since. So thanks Plato...
"Every desire for good and happiness is for each person a great and insidious love (...) Love is the desire to possess what is good forever." -Plato, Symposium XXIV
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Smelling Salts.
Someone's gonna need to get me a broom, because my brain may or may not have just exploded a little bit.
So, in Theology class today, which is always incredibly insightful and semi-life altering...I was kinda blown away. Normally when walking out of that class, I experience a feeling similar to that of getting off a really reeeally fast roller coaster. Like the kind where the whole time your cheeks are flapping and your hair is permanently plastered in that crazy windblown position, and all you can say is woooooah.
I realize I just made this class sounds a lot more painful/exciting than it actually is, but whatever you get the idea: its intense, insightful and I really enjoy it.
Anyways, today in class my prof was talking about how when we approach the doctrine of Christ, we tend to minimize Christ's humanity as a tactic to emphasize that He was God. All our lives as Christians, we have been focusing on the argument that Christ is in fact God. We have never had trouble trying to convince anyone that Christ was a man...because that is not the issue. The issue is that He is both fully man and fully God, but we seem to push the former to prove the latter. While doing this we dumb down how truly human Christ was, which is the one of the most personal connections we can make with Him; that He was one of us.
The point that hit me the hardest was when my prof related this to how we approach the work of Christ throughout His ministry, and how we trivialize it. "Oh, yeah, duh Jesus walked on water...obviously." "Mmhmm, Jesus changed water to wine, like that's hard or impressive." "Yes, Jesus totally raised people from the dead, I've heard that before, that's old news."
And then he mentioned this phrase...
So, in Theology class today, which is always incredibly insightful and semi-life altering...I was kinda blown away. Normally when walking out of that class, I experience a feeling similar to that of getting off a really reeeally fast roller coaster. Like the kind where the whole time your cheeks are flapping and your hair is permanently plastered in that crazy windblown position, and all you can say is woooooah.
I realize I just made this class sounds a lot more painful/exciting than it actually is, but whatever you get the idea: its intense, insightful and I really enjoy it.
Anyways, today in class my prof was talking about how when we approach the doctrine of Christ, we tend to minimize Christ's humanity as a tactic to emphasize that He was God. All our lives as Christians, we have been focusing on the argument that Christ is in fact God. We have never had trouble trying to convince anyone that Christ was a man...because that is not the issue. The issue is that He is both fully man and fully God, but we seem to push the former to prove the latter. While doing this we dumb down how truly human Christ was, which is the one of the most personal connections we can make with Him; that He was one of us.
The point that hit me the hardest was when my prof related this to how we approach the work of Christ throughout His ministry, and how we trivialize it. "Oh, yeah, duh Jesus walked on water...obviously." "Mmhmm, Jesus changed water to wine, like that's hard or impressive." "Yes, Jesus totally raised people from the dead, I've heard that before, that's old news."
And then he mentioned this phrase...
"The Bible should be like smelling salts."
He then went on to give an amazing parallel. We should read the work and life of Christ in the Gospels and be like, WHAT? SERIOUSLY? Instead of this bored and blase attitude we seem to possess towards the miraculous and seriously mind blowing works of Christ. I know that I have totally adopted this frame of mind, just because I know the story and have heard it a million times, that doesn't mean I should cease to be amazed or excited. This was a huge thought for me.
That is all, ponder that for a bit please, maybe you'll get the roller coaster feeling. I had class 9 hours ago and my hair is still windblown.
He then went on to give an amazing parallel. We should read the work and life of Christ in the Gospels and be like, WHAT? SERIOUSLY? Instead of this bored and blase attitude we seem to possess towards the miraculous and seriously mind blowing works of Christ. I know that I have totally adopted this frame of mind, just because I know the story and have heard it a million times, that doesn't mean I should cease to be amazed or excited. This was a huge thought for me.
The Bible should awaken our sleeping souls and revive us to the realization of the insane power and significance of Christ, not only as fully God, but also as fully man.
That is all, ponder that for a bit please, maybe you'll get the roller coaster feeling. I had class 9 hours ago and my hair is still windblown.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Success.
Mmm, nothing tastes quite as sweet as home. Cliche, but whatev.
After months of being surrounded by college students, coming home to my family was a bit of a culture shock. I never realized how much I missed babies and domesticated animals. I have been practically smothering my nephew ever since I got here and am showing more affection than usual to my poor neglected puppy (that I'm pretty sure only gets loved when I'm around, not really..but I just love her more than my other fam members).
But the much anticipated journey home really has been all I hoped. Today I ate like a pig and it was fantastic. Not only did I get to eat food that wasn't mass-produced in Biola's caf, but it was recepies that have been in my family for years, prepared by the ones I love. Perfect. At lunch we went around the table and each read a verse on thankfulness, sang some songs and expressed what we were most thankful for, while laughing and almost crying the whole time... aka my family at all times.
God is so good, He knew exactly what I needed from this weekend so He gave double. I never thought that just being in the company of my family and friends could be so medicinal. I havn't had a single stress since I got home and THAT is exactly what I needed and hoped for. Tomorrow will be a different story, I'll be working at my family's clothing store for an after Thanksgiving sale, so that will be intense and semi-stressful, but I get in the zone when I'm there and it's actually really fun.
I think, very superficially, besides being home with my family that being able to wear boots, scarves, jeans, and beanies...has been favorite thing. Give me cold weather any day. Seriously, please do. My other favorite thing is being able to be a mindless zombie. I'm sitting on the couch this very moment with my favorite C0-Bro, and the hardest decision we will have to make today is whether we should have one piece of of chocolate pie or two. Yessssss.
After months of being surrounded by college students, coming home to my family was a bit of a culture shock. I never realized how much I missed babies and domesticated animals. I have been practically smothering my nephew ever since I got here and am showing more affection than usual to my poor neglected puppy (that I'm pretty sure only gets loved when I'm around, not really..but I just love her more than my other fam members).
But the much anticipated journey home really has been all I hoped. Today I ate like a pig and it was fantastic. Not only did I get to eat food that wasn't mass-produced in Biola's caf, but it was recepies that have been in my family for years, prepared by the ones I love. Perfect. At lunch we went around the table and each read a verse on thankfulness, sang some songs and expressed what we were most thankful for, while laughing and almost crying the whole time... aka my family at all times.
God is so good, He knew exactly what I needed from this weekend so He gave double. I never thought that just being in the company of my family and friends could be so medicinal. I havn't had a single stress since I got home and THAT is exactly what I needed and hoped for. Tomorrow will be a different story, I'll be working at my family's clothing store for an after Thanksgiving sale, so that will be intense and semi-stressful, but I get in the zone when I'm there and it's actually really fun.
I think, very superficially, besides being home with my family that being able to wear boots, scarves, jeans, and beanies...has been favorite thing. Give me cold weather any day. Seriously, please do. My other favorite thing is being able to be a mindless zombie. I'm sitting on the couch this very moment with my favorite C0-Bro, and the hardest decision we will have to make today is whether we should have one piece of of chocolate pie or two. Yessssss.
Monday, November 24, 2008
Me and Art...and our love/hate relationship.
I LOVE...
That in my three hour classes I never use my hands for taking notes, only for creating things.
That after we finish a project we bring in snacks, put all our work on the wall and talk about them all, for 3 hours. Amazing.
That 20 students can be given the same project and same materials, and 20 completely unique, expressive and thoughtful pieces come out of it.
That in everyday life I wonder how long it would take me to draw the object I'm looking at or where the light hits on something I pass by.
That the creativity I have tapped in to through these classes has flown into every aspect of my life, my clothes, my walls, my thoughts, and my conversations.
That today in my drawing class my prof took us to watch one of the figure painting professors, paint from a model for three hours. It was amazing to watch the transformation from blank canvas to a successful piece and to hear his thoughts along the way.
That we have an entire wall in my dorm room dedicated to all the silly things I create. Affectionately titled "The Art Wall" ...how's that for creative?
That after all my art history classes I will never have to write a paper for the rest of my college career...mmm, delicious.
I HATE...
That no matter what you create, someone will always find at least 10 things you should've done differently.
That I get artist block like people get writer's block...the thinking just stops.
That no matter how many times I try, I canNOT draw an angle without a ruler to save my life.
That I still pale in comparison on the level of artsyness my fellow art majors seem to be on.
That I feel like artists speak gibberish/a different language, but I am slowly learning.
That art is so subjective, and that everyone feels entitled to give their opinion.
All in all, I'm learning everyday that God has created each mind and heart to express its inward workings in its individual manner.
I am still discovering what mine is.
And even though it's gonna be hell to get there, I can't waaaait.
That in my three hour classes I never use my hands for taking notes, only for creating things.
That after we finish a project we bring in snacks, put all our work on the wall and talk about them all, for 3 hours. Amazing.
That 20 students can be given the same project and same materials, and 20 completely unique, expressive and thoughtful pieces come out of it.
That in everyday life I wonder how long it would take me to draw the object I'm looking at or where the light hits on something I pass by.
That the creativity I have tapped in to through these classes has flown into every aspect of my life, my clothes, my walls, my thoughts, and my conversations.
That today in my drawing class my prof took us to watch one of the figure painting professors, paint from a model for three hours. It was amazing to watch the transformation from blank canvas to a successful piece and to hear his thoughts along the way.
That we have an entire wall in my dorm room dedicated to all the silly things I create. Affectionately titled "The Art Wall" ...how's that for creative?
That after all my art history classes I will never have to write a paper for the rest of my college career...mmm, delicious.
I HATE...
That no matter what you create, someone will always find at least 10 things you should've done differently.
That I get artist block like people get writer's block...the thinking just stops.
That no matter how many times I try, I canNOT draw an angle without a ruler to save my life.
That I still pale in comparison on the level of artsyness my fellow art majors seem to be on.
That I feel like artists speak gibberish/a different language, but I am slowly learning.
That art is so subjective, and that everyone feels entitled to give their opinion.
All in all, I'm learning everyday that God has created each mind and heart to express its inward workings in its individual manner.
I am still discovering what mine is.
And even though it's gonna be hell to get there, I can't waaaait.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
If I were a super hero, my super power would be Getting Lost.
I've decided that driving in LA is officially not my cup of tea.
Shocker, right? Really original thought, I bet you've NEVER heard that one before.
Well, I am just making a personal declaration that I already previously felt was true, but was solidified for me this weekend. Details? Why certainly...
I took one of my friends, Kendra (who ironically was the first prospective student who stayed with me last year at Biola Bound. She now attends Biola, and lives in my dorm, on my floor...across the hall. Crazy) and we went to the LA Fashion District to get some merchandise for Go Lucky, which I have done several times before.
When we arrive, I realize neither of us have cash, and we have to pay to park. Hmmm.
So, brilliantly I decided we would just drive around and find an ATM, get cash, and be on our way. The plan was working perfectly, I punched in all the info into my GPS and I was dodging cars and pedistrians like there was no tomorrow. When we get to Washington Mutual ATM aka a tiny kiosk inside a mini-McDonald's (classy, right?) I just tell Kendra to hop out and get the cash and I'll swing back and pick her up because there was no parking on the busy street. Perfect, or so we thought.
It turns out that one-way streets and I are not the best of friends, because I got SO incredibly turned around that I ended up on 16th street when I dropped Kendra off at 7th street...seriously? seriously. So here I am, in my Jeep (which all of the sudden feels like driving a tank with zero turn radius around all these tiny BMW's and crowded streets) with only Gypsy (my GPS, whose satille reception was too weak to do any good) by my side, and I am near tears wanting SO badly to know where I am and how to get back to where I was. Meanwhile, Kendra is calling me every few mintues, by herself, on the street corner getting hit on repeatedly, perfect.
I finally after a good 20 minutes of frantically making right turns, squinting at street signs and suppressing all desires to cry, I make it back to Kendra and we scream and whine the whole way back to the Fash. Dist. And at the end of the day, the man at the parking garage ended up liking me a little more than I preffered or anticipated and let us park for FREE. The $20 from that cursed ATM is still in my wallet.
Moral of the story: Make friends with parking lot attendants with hopes that they will fall in love with you and give you free parking. The end.
Shocker, right? Really original thought, I bet you've NEVER heard that one before.
Well, I am just making a personal declaration that I already previously felt was true, but was solidified for me this weekend. Details? Why certainly...
I took one of my friends, Kendra (who ironically was the first prospective student who stayed with me last year at Biola Bound. She now attends Biola, and lives in my dorm, on my floor...across the hall. Crazy) and we went to the LA Fashion District to get some merchandise for Go Lucky, which I have done several times before.
When we arrive, I realize neither of us have cash, and we have to pay to park. Hmmm.
So, brilliantly I decided we would just drive around and find an ATM, get cash, and be on our way. The plan was working perfectly, I punched in all the info into my GPS and I was dodging cars and pedistrians like there was no tomorrow. When we get to Washington Mutual ATM aka a tiny kiosk inside a mini-McDonald's (classy, right?) I just tell Kendra to hop out and get the cash and I'll swing back and pick her up because there was no parking on the busy street. Perfect, or so we thought.
It turns out that one-way streets and I are not the best of friends, because I got SO incredibly turned around that I ended up on 16th street when I dropped Kendra off at 7th street...seriously? seriously. So here I am, in my Jeep (which all of the sudden feels like driving a tank with zero turn radius around all these tiny BMW's and crowded streets) with only Gypsy (my GPS, whose satille reception was too weak to do any good) by my side, and I am near tears wanting SO badly to know where I am and how to get back to where I was. Meanwhile, Kendra is calling me every few mintues, by herself, on the street corner getting hit on repeatedly, perfect.
I finally after a good 20 minutes of frantically making right turns, squinting at street signs and suppressing all desires to cry, I make it back to Kendra and we scream and whine the whole way back to the Fash. Dist. And at the end of the day, the man at the parking garage ended up liking me a little more than I preffered or anticipated and let us park for FREE. The $20 from that cursed ATM is still in my wallet.
Moral of the story: Make friends with parking lot attendants with hopes that they will fall in love with you and give you free parking. The end.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
It's Oregon time now, yes? Yes...
Ahhhhh, so ready for this. I know this picture is semi-creepy, but in reality, it looks awesome right now.
I am SO ready to be in Meddy, it's a little ridiculous. It's not even the fact that I'm homesick, even though it will be great to see everyone and be home. I am DYING to be cold, wear boots and scarves, get coffee with my sister, cuddle with Lawson, cook T-Give dinner with the fam, laugh and catch up, see my breath when I'm outside, eat food that wasn't mass produced for 5,000 people, and actually clean a dish or two instead of setting it on a revolving tray and watching it disappear. I can't wait to lie on the couch, and not think or talk or be productive by any means. Mmmm...please tell me that sounds incredible, and if it doesn't you are silly.
I'm pretty sure that I'm just so insanely over schoolwork and being at school that I just need retreat to the 541 ASAP and me a mindless noodle for a few days.
This little lady looks so zen, and relaxed in that cozy chair. Her hair is just blowing in the breeze....she is out cold and has no shame. I can't wait to sleep and not set my alarm, that sounds heavenly.
Clearly, I am ready for a break. To say the least I am burnt out, and need to recharge my batteries in the place I love most with the people I love most. And then come back to good old school and attack the last few weeks of the semester with full force.
I'm comin' Oregon...just hold on a few more days, and then our much anticipated reunion can commence.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Duh, why wouldn't you sign it?
OK! SO, I just found out about this website (www.fightfoca.com) regarding the complete legalization of abortion...WOAH, hold on!
So take a sec and read over this info, GO TO THE WEBSITE, fill out your name and address. It just takes a second and could make a huge difference in our country! So get out there, be informed, and be active.
"The first thing I’d do as President is sign the Freedom of Choice Act. That’s the first thing I’d do." -President-Elect Obama
The Freedom of Choice Act (FOCA) would eliminate every restriction on abortion nationwide.
-FOCA will do away with the state laws on parental involvement, on partial birth abortion, and on all other protections.
-FOCA will compel taxpayer funding of abortions.
-FOCA will force faith-based hospitals and healthcare facilities to perform abortions.
Barak Obama believes this legislation will "end abortion wars." To him this means eradicating every state and federal law on abortion - laws that the majority of Americans support.
The time to Fight FOCA is now. With Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid in charge of Congress, we can expect a fight over FOCA to begin as soon as the next Congress begins.
Please add your name to the FIGHT FOCA petition and let your friends know about President-Elect Barak Obama's promise is expand abortion throughout the country.
The FightFOCA petition will be sent to key members of congress upon the re-introcduction of the Freedom of Choice Act in the 111th Congress, and to President-Elect Obama. (all information was taken from: www.fightfoca.com)
So....duh, right? That's what I thought too. Get out there and save some babies, sign, sign, sign!!
So take a sec and read over this info, GO TO THE WEBSITE, fill out your name and address. It just takes a second and could make a huge difference in our country! So get out there, be informed, and be active.
"The first thing I’d do as President is sign the Freedom of Choice Act. That’s the first thing I’d do." -President-Elect Obama
The Freedom of Choice Act (FOCA) would eliminate every restriction on abortion nationwide.
-FOCA will do away with the state laws on parental involvement, on partial birth abortion, and on all other protections.
-FOCA will compel taxpayer funding of abortions.
-FOCA will force faith-based hospitals and healthcare facilities to perform abortions.
Barak Obama believes this legislation will "end abortion wars." To him this means eradicating every state and federal law on abortion - laws that the majority of Americans support.
The time to Fight FOCA is now. With Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid in charge of Congress, we can expect a fight over FOCA to begin as soon as the next Congress begins.
Please add your name to the FIGHT FOCA petition and let your friends know about President-Elect Barak Obama's promise is expand abortion throughout the country.
The FightFOCA petition will be sent to key members of congress upon the re-introcduction of the Freedom of Choice Act in the 111th Congress, and to President-Elect Obama. (all information was taken from: www.fightfoca.com)
So....duh, right? That's what I thought too. Get out there and save some babies, sign, sign, sign!!
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Get Inspired.
The Lion's Mane - Trevor Hall
Well I woke up in the Lion’s Mane
Kissing silhouettes of mountains dancing in the moonlight
Am I awake or is this a dream?
Or am I awaking into a state of wakefulness
Buried deep in my deepest dreaming sleep?
You can only guess what happened next
I swallowed an apple seed and gave birth to angel’s wings
Which lifted me to the top of this orange grove
Where I saw a man trying to count
All the oranges
All the trees
And all the leaves
Turns out this man was me
Losing count and starting over
Losing count and starting over
Chasing my own tale until I got dizzy
And fell asleep in the clouds
Well I woke up in the Lion’s Mane
On a single lane road deep within God’s Dreadlocks
When I gave my banana to the blind man
Only to realize who was really blind
My eyes couldn’t decide
My eyes couldn’t define
My eyes couldn’t see that this blind man was me
We then continued to a village of meeting rivers
Where Mother Earth washed me down and gave me a new birth
Where my sight was restored
And I could see all the gems hiding on the ocean’s floor
Well I dove in
Actually did a canon ball
And swam deeper and deeper
As things got clearer and clearer
And when I saw all of the sharks
I wasn’t afraid
For this time enshrined in my heart was the Almighty’s Name
I think my sanity has gone insane
I woke up in the Lion’s Mane
Trevor Hall is one of my absolute faves and his new album "This Is Blue" just came out; buy, listen, and love. His lyrics are (clearly) fantastic and his crazy voice makes border line ridiculous. The album's been on repeat in my room for days now. PERFECT.
Well I woke up in the Lion’s Mane
Kissing silhouettes of mountains dancing in the moonlight
Am I awake or is this a dream?
Or am I awaking into a state of wakefulness
Buried deep in my deepest dreaming sleep?
You can only guess what happened next
I swallowed an apple seed and gave birth to angel’s wings
Which lifted me to the top of this orange grove
Where I saw a man trying to count
All the oranges
All the trees
And all the leaves
Turns out this man was me
Losing count and starting over
Losing count and starting over
Chasing my own tale until I got dizzy
And fell asleep in the clouds
Well I woke up in the Lion’s Mane
On a single lane road deep within God’s Dreadlocks
When I gave my banana to the blind man
Only to realize who was really blind
My eyes couldn’t decide
My eyes couldn’t define
My eyes couldn’t see that this blind man was me
We then continued to a village of meeting rivers
Where Mother Earth washed me down and gave me a new birth
Where my sight was restored
And I could see all the gems hiding on the ocean’s floor
Well I dove in
Actually did a canon ball
And swam deeper and deeper
As things got clearer and clearer
And when I saw all of the sharks
I wasn’t afraid
For this time enshrined in my heart was the Almighty’s Name
I think my sanity has gone insane
I woke up in the Lion’s Mane
Trevor Hall is one of my absolute faves and his new album "This Is Blue" just came out; buy, listen, and love. His lyrics are (clearly) fantastic and his crazy voice makes border line ridiculous. The album's been on repeat in my room for days now. PERFECT.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
My brain is runnin' on empty.
I have come to the sad realization that my mind does in fact have a very small capacity these days...hmff. The more I try to cram into it, the more it just sits there with it's arms folded, giggling at me and my attempts to fill it with glorious knowledge. And THEN when I try to extract thoughts, facts, or energey from it, it clamps a giant padlock on itself and slaps a combination on there that I will NEVER be able to figure out. Oh, mind...what do you want from me? haha
Ok, I'll admit that was a litttttle dramatic, but still. I'm pretty sure my mind is on tunnel vision for T-give in Meddy with the fam. CanNOT wait. And unfortunately this is the point in the semester that EVERY prof realizes they had better hurry up and cover everything that was on the syllabus that they gleefully skipped over during the first 6 weeks. So every class is gushing with projects, papers, tests, quizzes and about a bizillion pages of reading, no big deal.
But thankfully I serve a God who will never dish out more than I can take in, so here we gooooo!
P.s... it was COLD in SoCal today! Very exciting....
Ok, I'll admit that was a litttttle dramatic, but still. I'm pretty sure my mind is on tunnel vision for T-give in Meddy with the fam. CanNOT wait. And unfortunately this is the point in the semester that EVERY prof realizes they had better hurry up and cover everything that was on the syllabus that they gleefully skipped over during the first 6 weeks. So every class is gushing with projects, papers, tests, quizzes and about a bizillion pages of reading, no big deal.
But thankfully I serve a God who will never dish out more than I can take in, so here we gooooo!
P.s... it was COLD in SoCal today! Very exciting....
Thursday, November 6, 2008
While we're at it...
I already posted my personal creed on God, and just yesterday had to turn in this paper concerning God and humanity. This one is a little more scattered, my prof was pretty vague on the guidelines this time, so we shall see what grade he decides to grant me :) But here it is...
I believe:
God created the universe in its entirety (Gen, 1:1; Col. 1:16; Acts 14:15). Before the universe and all humanity were created, God existed (Ps. 90:2; Gen. 1:1; Col. 1:16). God created man in his own image in order to represent himself in the purest form (Acts 17:28; 2:7). God created man to be unique individuals with the ability to govern their own lives and decisions (Gal. 6:7-8; Eph. 2:10). Humanity was created in God’s image and was specifically appointed to rule all other aspects of creation (Gen 5:1-2; Gen. 1:26-28). Even though man was created in the Image of God, man is not identical to God, but is instead a representation of him (Gen 5:1; Gen. 1:26-27). Because humanity was created in the Image of God, man belongs to God and has great significance. Therefore, human life is deeply valued, worthy of respect and should be modeled after that of Jesus Christ (2 Cor. 5:16; Mark 12:13-17).
God is on an infinitely higher level in relation to humanity, but is still completely active and present in the midst of creation at all times (Eph. 4:6; Job 12:10; John. 8:23). God is extremely prevalent in the lives of humanity, and he provides all things needed in order for man to exist and guides him in the direction he should go (Ps. 145:15; James 4:13-15). Humanity was not created because God was lacking anything within himself, rather man was created in order to be in a relationship with God (Acts 17:24-25; John 17:3). Man, and the relationship between God and man, was created as a fulfillment of God’s purpose to bring glory to himself (1 Cor. 10:31; Ps. 19:1; Isa 43:7; Rev. 4:11).
Humanity has been defined on two levels, ontological and functional. Ultimately, humanity was modeled after God’s image and is now tainted by the fall of man but not destroyed and still holds as the biblical platform for humanity (1 John 4:21-21; Matt. 22:37-40; James 3:8) Human beings are comprised of two parts: the spiritual and physical (Ecc. 12:7; Matt. 10:28). The spiritual part consists of the soul or spirit, and the physical part consists of the body; both of which are vital components that together create the essence of humanity (Mark 12:30; Heb 4:12).
Men and women, as equal parts of humanity, are also equally created in the Image of God. Therefore, they are both equally fallen in their sinful nature and need to be redeemed (Gen 1:27; Gen 2:28). In his sovereignty, God allows evil to occur amongst his creation, but is not responsible for the evil actions done by humanity (Job 1:21; Deut. 32:39). As a result of the allowance of sin, humanity apart from God is totally incapable of receiving salvation from sin and death. Therefore, man is not able to know, see, surrender, and understand God and because of this is not equipped to live for and glorify Him (John 3:3; 6:44). Although humanity was considered “very good” at the point of creation, all humans are inherently sinful, but are brought out of sin and into life as a result of the redemption of Christ (Gen 1:31; Gal. 3:28; Rom. 3:23).
I believe:
God created the universe in its entirety (Gen, 1:1; Col. 1:16; Acts 14:15). Before the universe and all humanity were created, God existed (Ps. 90:2; Gen. 1:1; Col. 1:16). God created man in his own image in order to represent himself in the purest form (Acts 17:28; 2:7). God created man to be unique individuals with the ability to govern their own lives and decisions (Gal. 6:7-8; Eph. 2:10). Humanity was created in God’s image and was specifically appointed to rule all other aspects of creation (Gen 5:1-2; Gen. 1:26-28). Even though man was created in the Image of God, man is not identical to God, but is instead a representation of him (Gen 5:1; Gen. 1:26-27). Because humanity was created in the Image of God, man belongs to God and has great significance. Therefore, human life is deeply valued, worthy of respect and should be modeled after that of Jesus Christ (2 Cor. 5:16; Mark 12:13-17).
God is on an infinitely higher level in relation to humanity, but is still completely active and present in the midst of creation at all times (Eph. 4:6; Job 12:10; John. 8:23). God is extremely prevalent in the lives of humanity, and he provides all things needed in order for man to exist and guides him in the direction he should go (Ps. 145:15; James 4:13-15). Humanity was not created because God was lacking anything within himself, rather man was created in order to be in a relationship with God (Acts 17:24-25; John 17:3). Man, and the relationship between God and man, was created as a fulfillment of God’s purpose to bring glory to himself (1 Cor. 10:31; Ps. 19:1; Isa 43:7; Rev. 4:11).
Humanity has been defined on two levels, ontological and functional. Ultimately, humanity was modeled after God’s image and is now tainted by the fall of man but not destroyed and still holds as the biblical platform for humanity (1 John 4:21-21; Matt. 22:37-40; James 3:8) Human beings are comprised of two parts: the spiritual and physical (Ecc. 12:7; Matt. 10:28). The spiritual part consists of the soul or spirit, and the physical part consists of the body; both of which are vital components that together create the essence of humanity (Mark 12:30; Heb 4:12).
Men and women, as equal parts of humanity, are also equally created in the Image of God. Therefore, they are both equally fallen in their sinful nature and need to be redeemed (Gen 1:27; Gen 2:28). In his sovereignty, God allows evil to occur amongst his creation, but is not responsible for the evil actions done by humanity (Job 1:21; Deut. 32:39). As a result of the allowance of sin, humanity apart from God is totally incapable of receiving salvation from sin and death. Therefore, man is not able to know, see, surrender, and understand God and because of this is not equipped to live for and glorify Him (John 3:3; 6:44). Although humanity was considered “very good” at the point of creation, all humans are inherently sinful, but are brought out of sin and into life as a result of the redemption of Christ (Gen 1:31; Gal. 3:28; Rom. 3:23).
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Yep, definitely just jinxed myself....
Well head cold, you win yet again! I thought I was being so clever, but I now know better than to threaten my health, touche immune system...touche.
The other day while at work, one of my co-workers was coughing and hacking away and thought to myself, man...poor guy, good thing I'm not gonna get sick this fall! Yeah, I've been taking my vitamins and washing my hands and all that jazz, surely I won't get sick. FALSE. My new friend paralyzing sickness decided to drop by yesterday and set up permanent residence last night and this morning in my head, nose and throat.
As an act of rebellion or rather... defeat, instead of attending my drawing class today, I'm in my dorm room, wallowing in my infirmity, drinking tea, wandering around in a daze, eating breakfast, and attempting to do homework.
You won the battle sickness, but I'll win the war, get ready for some hard core vitamin c and sleep comin' your way...
The other day while at work, one of my co-workers was coughing and hacking away and thought to myself, man...poor guy, good thing I'm not gonna get sick this fall! Yeah, I've been taking my vitamins and washing my hands and all that jazz, surely I won't get sick. FALSE. My new friend paralyzing sickness decided to drop by yesterday and set up permanent residence last night and this morning in my head, nose and throat.
As an act of rebellion or rather... defeat, instead of attending my drawing class today, I'm in my dorm room, wallowing in my infirmity, drinking tea, wandering around in a daze, eating breakfast, and attempting to do homework.
You won the battle sickness, but I'll win the war, get ready for some hard core vitamin c and sleep comin' your way...
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Hmmm...God, eh?
This is a personal creed on God I was required to write for my theology class a few weeks ago. We were instructed to communicate our beliefs on God and incorporate the reading and class lectures. AND it had to be only one page, INSANE I know...haha. I wasn't very happy with the grade, but that doesn't make any of it less true! Hope you enjoy :)
I believe:
In one God (Deut 4:35, Isa 45:5) who displays himself in three distinct but unified persons, who are each fully God, represented within the Trinity as the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit (Gen 1:26, John 1:1-4). God exists, is eternal and self-sufficient (Isa 45:5, 46:9). God reveals Himself to us in an intimate setting through His incommunicable attributes. God is so other than myself that it is impossible to know God, His thoughts, and characteristics in their entirety (Ps. 147:5, 1 Cor. 2:10-11). God allows me to gain knowledge of His character and attributes at a finite level, although He is infinite (Deut 29:29, 2 Peter 1:2-3). He is self-sufficient and does not need creation to survive. He does not need any other being or form to amplify His tremendous glory (Ex 3:14, Acts 17:24-25).
God is constant; He never changes or portrays Himself as anything conflicting with His character. He never makes the wrong decision, goes back on His word or acts unjustly; He is steadfast in all His ways (Malachi 3:6). God does not exist within time constraints even though He willingly places Himself within the realm of time in order to have relationships with us. He was present since before there was time and therefore is not bound by it (Rev. 1:8, Psalm 90:2). Just as God is not restricted by time, He is also free from the constraints of size, space and location. He is at all places at all times. God is not at all compromising Himself by being omnipresent, but instead His greatness is magnified (Psalm 139:7-10). In all these things God is unified. He does not compartmentalize His nature into separate areas or circumstances. He is not contradictory or lacking in any area (2 Cor. 1:19-20).
God relates to us on a human level through His communicable attributes which we have in common with Him. God is without sin and is therefore pure and holy, and worthy of all praise (Isa 6:3). Not only is God holy, but He is sovereign and has the ability and power to complete His perfect will. God’s sovereignty is a core attribute that ties all His other attributes together (Job 42:1, Eph 1:11). The knowledge of God is the perfect and driving force behind His holiness and sovereignty. God’s wisdom is consistently true and unwavering. In no stretch of the imagination could we even begin to describe or determine God infinite intellect (Heb 4:13, Dan 2:20). God encompasses everything that is beautiful. He is perfection and a reflection of everything beauty should exude (Psalm 27:4).
The heart of God seems conflicted because it is loving, just and full of wrath. However, His divine love covers us and that love was beautifully expressed when God sent Christ, His son, to become love incarnate for us (1 John 4:9-10). The contradiction of love and wrath is never a dilemma with God. He is flawless in His ability to possess great love and great fury for His people (Ex 34:5-7). In the midst of anger and wrath, God is also merciful and gracious. He is complete in faithfulness and forgiveness to the point of brimming over. He never makes a mistake about when to extend mercy or forgiveness (Num 23:19). God’s grace is limitless and properly distributed and He bestows grace on those who both do and do not deserve it (Rom 11:6). God’s thirst for righteousness and justice is unquenchable. He is the standard to which all humanity must measure up and He will not rest until that goal is met (Rom 3:25-26). The one attribute of God that ties them all together is jealousy. God is jealous for glory to be shown to Him and for our full attention to be on Him as we respond in obedience to His will (Ex 34:14). God’s attributes are all encompassing of His character and cannot operate without one another
I believe:
In one God (Deut 4:35, Isa 45:5) who displays himself in three distinct but unified persons, who are each fully God, represented within the Trinity as the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit (Gen 1:26, John 1:1-4). God exists, is eternal and self-sufficient (Isa 45:5, 46:9). God reveals Himself to us in an intimate setting through His incommunicable attributes. God is so other than myself that it is impossible to know God, His thoughts, and characteristics in their entirety (Ps. 147:5, 1 Cor. 2:10-11). God allows me to gain knowledge of His character and attributes at a finite level, although He is infinite (Deut 29:29, 2 Peter 1:2-3). He is self-sufficient and does not need creation to survive. He does not need any other being or form to amplify His tremendous glory (Ex 3:14, Acts 17:24-25).
God is constant; He never changes or portrays Himself as anything conflicting with His character. He never makes the wrong decision, goes back on His word or acts unjustly; He is steadfast in all His ways (Malachi 3:6). God does not exist within time constraints even though He willingly places Himself within the realm of time in order to have relationships with us. He was present since before there was time and therefore is not bound by it (Rev. 1:8, Psalm 90:2). Just as God is not restricted by time, He is also free from the constraints of size, space and location. He is at all places at all times. God is not at all compromising Himself by being omnipresent, but instead His greatness is magnified (Psalm 139:7-10). In all these things God is unified. He does not compartmentalize His nature into separate areas or circumstances. He is not contradictory or lacking in any area (2 Cor. 1:19-20).
God relates to us on a human level through His communicable attributes which we have in common with Him. God is without sin and is therefore pure and holy, and worthy of all praise (Isa 6:3). Not only is God holy, but He is sovereign and has the ability and power to complete His perfect will. God’s sovereignty is a core attribute that ties all His other attributes together (Job 42:1, Eph 1:11). The knowledge of God is the perfect and driving force behind His holiness and sovereignty. God’s wisdom is consistently true and unwavering. In no stretch of the imagination could we even begin to describe or determine God infinite intellect (Heb 4:13, Dan 2:20). God encompasses everything that is beautiful. He is perfection and a reflection of everything beauty should exude (Psalm 27:4).
The heart of God seems conflicted because it is loving, just and full of wrath. However, His divine love covers us and that love was beautifully expressed when God sent Christ, His son, to become love incarnate for us (1 John 4:9-10). The contradiction of love and wrath is never a dilemma with God. He is flawless in His ability to possess great love and great fury for His people (Ex 34:5-7). In the midst of anger and wrath, God is also merciful and gracious. He is complete in faithfulness and forgiveness to the point of brimming over. He never makes a mistake about when to extend mercy or forgiveness (Num 23:19). God’s grace is limitless and properly distributed and He bestows grace on those who both do and do not deserve it (Rom 11:6). God’s thirst for righteousness and justice is unquenchable. He is the standard to which all humanity must measure up and He will not rest until that goal is met (Rom 3:25-26). The one attribute of God that ties them all together is jealousy. God is jealous for glory to be shown to Him and for our full attention to be on Him as we respond in obedience to His will (Ex 34:14). God’s attributes are all encompassing of His character and cannot operate without one another
Saturday, November 1, 2008
"Hey you, always on the run...
...Gotta slow it down baby, gotta have some fun."
Which is exactly what my girls and I did on Halloween, never turn down solid advice given through Spice Girls lyrics.
There was a dance last night that happens every Halloween called Dance Dance Spooktacular and it was at a dance studio with two rooms. One had a DJ and the other room was supposed to have an iPod hook up, but ended up being random CDs lying around the studio. Trying to avoid the intensely dirty dancing situation at all costs, we would make cameos in the DJ room but mostly held down the fort in the more spacious and slightly less sweaty room. I managed to scrounge up some Footloose and Spice Girls in a cubbord, which is all you need really for a good time.
Well, no more time to play, time to hit the books.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Oh, dear.
How silly of me to think...ok great, midterms are over I will have a little time to catch up and chill out before the work starts piling up again. So funny. I already have another test, and paper, and project. Due next week, fun! Not to be a debbie downer, but I'm not too pleased with this whole massive amounts of stuff to do business...not my cup of tea.
BUT Thanksgiving break is in a few weeks and there are many wonderful things this time of year that seem to make me feel better regardless of the craziness in my life.
1. The temperature is slightly dropping here in SoCal, I'm wearing a scarf today in hopes that it will actually get cold enough to be functional instead of merely fashionable.
2. The leaves are falling....love it.
3. Punk n' Pie. Biola's annual talent show that was last night. Very entertaining and festive, and free pumpkin pie afterwards (which is the real reason my friends and I attend in the first place)
4.Halloween festivities. Tomorrow night I will be Tom Cruise from Risky Business, very exciting.
5. Being able to listen to Christmas music soon, without feeling weird or festivly out of place.
6. I get to go home soon to REAL fall weather in lovely Oregon w/ the people I love. CAN'T wait.
Until then, I will enjoy all the faux fall that California has to offer.
BUT Thanksgiving break is in a few weeks and there are many wonderful things this time of year that seem to make me feel better regardless of the craziness in my life.
1. The temperature is slightly dropping here in SoCal, I'm wearing a scarf today in hopes that it will actually get cold enough to be functional instead of merely fashionable.
2. The leaves are falling....love it.
3. Punk n' Pie. Biola's annual talent show that was last night. Very entertaining and festive, and free pumpkin pie afterwards (which is the real reason my friends and I attend in the first place)
4.Halloween festivities. Tomorrow night I will be Tom Cruise from Risky Business, very exciting.
5. Being able to listen to Christmas music soon, without feeling weird or festivly out of place.
6. I get to go home soon to REAL fall weather in lovely Oregon w/ the people I love. CAN'T wait.
Until then, I will enjoy all the faux fall that California has to offer.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
My walls are drowning...
When entering my dorm room, it is normal to be visually overwhelmed. The normal reaction we get from visitors is "Woah! It's crazy in here...so many colors!" It is normal to feel instantly cluttered and get the sensation you are walking into an area people have been living in for months and months. My roommate and I have a clutter problem, well more like a clutter craving. We both feel most at home when we are surrounded by the things we love, and we both love lots of things, clearly.
I have accumulated lots of love and have plastered my walls with it. I brought back some (giant) leaves from my visit home this month, which are hanging next to the Art Wall, which is next to my posters, which are next to my Italian peace flag. And yesterday I got the pictures I ordered in the mail from Snapfish, and they are frantically taking residence on almost the entire wall next to by bed. And above my bed (which is the bottom of Angela's bed) is also covered with pictures, collages, postcards, verses, magazine cut outs, and of course...James Dean.
The outward expression of myself is on display in every wall of the room. My love for my family, friends, the outdoors, my home, traveling, appreciation for different cultures and countries, photography, art and adventure. My walls are drowning...and I like it that way.
I have accumulated lots of love and have plastered my walls with it. I brought back some (giant) leaves from my visit home this month, which are hanging next to the Art Wall, which is next to my posters, which are next to my Italian peace flag. And yesterday I got the pictures I ordered in the mail from Snapfish, and they are frantically taking residence on almost the entire wall next to by bed. And above my bed (which is the bottom of Angela's bed) is also covered with pictures, collages, postcards, verses, magazine cut outs, and of course...James Dean.
The outward expression of myself is on display in every wall of the room. My love for my family, friends, the outdoors, my home, traveling, appreciation for different cultures and countries, photography, art and adventure. My walls are drowning...and I like it that way.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
I don't really want to jump rope right now, thanks though.
There are many things I could and probably should be doing right now, but I'm just not motivated to. It feels like when you're about to dive into a jump rope or double dutch session, you just can't seem to find the right time or strength to hop in. Partly because you don't want to get slapped in the head with the rope, but mostly because you don't want to get tripped up, tangled or flustered.
Hmm, I can't really put a finger on why I'm feeling this way lately, but I definitely know that it's weird and that I don't want to be in the audience of my own life. I feel like maybe it's because everything in my life at this point is bound by a tight schedule, and I don't think I'm really a schedule type person. I feel like I need to step outside of the limitations I have on my life and just get away, but that's totally not an option right now.
I also feel like the things that are occupying my time are very lukewarm. For instance, my job - yes it pays, but it also takes a lot from me personally and I don't know how much longer I can be drained by it. My classes - yes they are good, but they are getting pretty discouraging, art is kinda tough right now and I'm starting to wonder if I'm cut out for it. I really want to be because I really enjoy it, but I feel so silly sometimes. My friends - are wonderful, but I don't get to spend time with them as much as I would like to because school is taking over all of our lives lately. My spiritual life - is being enriched by my classes yes, but is getting overshadowed and even diminished by all this commotion going on.
Man, I did'nt realize how much I had to whine about. I'll try to take that down a notch. And hmm, well I'll just try to find a way to spice up my life. And also make time of nothingness to just...be.
Hmm, I can't really put a finger on why I'm feeling this way lately, but I definitely know that it's weird and that I don't want to be in the audience of my own life. I feel like maybe it's because everything in my life at this point is bound by a tight schedule, and I don't think I'm really a schedule type person. I feel like I need to step outside of the limitations I have on my life and just get away, but that's totally not an option right now.
I also feel like the things that are occupying my time are very lukewarm. For instance, my job - yes it pays, but it also takes a lot from me personally and I don't know how much longer I can be drained by it. My classes - yes they are good, but they are getting pretty discouraging, art is kinda tough right now and I'm starting to wonder if I'm cut out for it. I really want to be because I really enjoy it, but I feel so silly sometimes. My friends - are wonderful, but I don't get to spend time with them as much as I would like to because school is taking over all of our lives lately. My spiritual life - is being enriched by my classes yes, but is getting overshadowed and even diminished by all this commotion going on.
Man, I did'nt realize how much I had to whine about. I'll try to take that down a notch. And hmm, well I'll just try to find a way to spice up my life. And also make time of nothingness to just...be.
Friday, October 10, 2008
Dear Fall, please come to California. Sincerely, Rachel
Ok, so I've officially decided I am a cold weather person. I've always enjoyed summer weather, being outside in the sunshine and all the super fun activities that type of climate entails. But ever since I've moved down here for school, I get the opposite weather effect than one you would assume. People that live in cold climates, I'm guessing, get depressed when it's cold and rainy all the time. For some reason, I'm getting way bummed out by all this WARM weather! I know, right? I've got it backwards. I have been craving cold weather literally everyday and would take a sweater over a tank top in a second! It's funny because when it gets even a little bit chilly down here I bundle up, hoping that it will get really cold...and then I just look silly because it's barely cold enough for a sweatshirt, jeez. I wish someone would inform SoCal that it's time for it to be fall now =)
It's weird though, I wish that I could just chill out and enjoy all the warm weather, but I just wanna cuddle up and listen to the rain...I guess I'll have to wait till I head back up to Oregon and get my freezing fix. Maybe until then I'll just blast the AC and take cold showers, we'll see what I come up with...
It's weird though, I wish that I could just chill out and enjoy all the warm weather, but I just wanna cuddle up and listen to the rain...I guess I'll have to wait till I head back up to Oregon and get my freezing fix. Maybe until then I'll just blast the AC and take cold showers, we'll see what I come up with...
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Artistic Overload
Woah, it's been months since I've been on here! And not to treat it like a diary, but goodness so much has happened since then. But recapping is silliness and there is no need, so just pretend everything is up to date and every detail has been expressed vividly.
I feel like the biggest thing I've been learning this semester is how to think and see things artistically. All of my classes have successfully opened my eyes to see each subject differently and with a fresh outlook. My art classes especially have been smacking me around quite a bit and have been training my mind's eye to wield its creativity in a way that is visually and verbally expressive. I find myself in everyday life noticing value, composition, lighting and on and on in every day objects or views; I would have NEVER cared or even valued this before. I find myself thinking, "hmm, how could I draw that?" Weird, I know. And I also know I do NOT draw, but I'm learning, slowly.
My philosophy and theology classes have been very stimulating as well. They have opened my mind in a deeper and more realistic since that are based upon my core beliefs. I am constantly in awe of what I learn in these classes because they are literally pinnacle points of my life that I base all beliefs, decisions, and actions upon and I am now being challenged to express these beliefs. It's so tough, but so great and beneficial.
I feel like in all these things, I am being drastically overstimulated, my mind actually might eventually deflate because of all this junk (helpful junk, but junk none the less) that is waiting its turn to hop into my brain and boggle me. This is all part of why college is so crazy. When am I ever going to have this opportunity ever again? To sit all day and listen to some of the wisest and most experienced minds in their field? When again can I ever be a mental garbage disposal and just take in and digest everything I'm learning and experiencing? When will I ever be able to be surrounded by people that encourage, inspire, and bring joy to my life that can relate to me in my current state of life right now? Never.
Even though I feel like I'm being mentally and artistically fire hosed right now, I really don't want it to end, and I know it will, so I've just gotta be a sponge.
I feel like the biggest thing I've been learning this semester is how to think and see things artistically. All of my classes have successfully opened my eyes to see each subject differently and with a fresh outlook. My art classes especially have been smacking me around quite a bit and have been training my mind's eye to wield its creativity in a way that is visually and verbally expressive. I find myself in everyday life noticing value, composition, lighting and on and on in every day objects or views; I would have NEVER cared or even valued this before. I find myself thinking, "hmm, how could I draw that?" Weird, I know. And I also know I do NOT draw, but I'm learning, slowly.
My philosophy and theology classes have been very stimulating as well. They have opened my mind in a deeper and more realistic since that are based upon my core beliefs. I am constantly in awe of what I learn in these classes because they are literally pinnacle points of my life that I base all beliefs, decisions, and actions upon and I am now being challenged to express these beliefs. It's so tough, but so great and beneficial.
I feel like in all these things, I am being drastically overstimulated, my mind actually might eventually deflate because of all this junk (helpful junk, but junk none the less) that is waiting its turn to hop into my brain and boggle me. This is all part of why college is so crazy. When am I ever going to have this opportunity ever again? To sit all day and listen to some of the wisest and most experienced minds in their field? When again can I ever be a mental garbage disposal and just take in and digest everything I'm learning and experiencing? When will I ever be able to be surrounded by people that encourage, inspire, and bring joy to my life that can relate to me in my current state of life right now? Never.
Even though I feel like I'm being mentally and artistically fire hosed right now, I really don't want it to end, and I know it will, so I've just gotta be a sponge.
Saturday, July 26, 2008
Itchin' for some artwork
The past couple of days, I've just been wishing I had a house (of my own) that I could decorate and fill with goodies. Maybe it's the fact that my sister keeps getting Pottery Barn magazines aaand I keep looking at them, or I'm just eager to have place of my own, who knows. The point is that I want some art. I want some legit artsy art that I can put up in my own place and just drown the walls with funk and obscurity. I want to have a place that you walk into and just know its mine without having to ask any questions, but just look around my house to figure me out.
When I was in Europe last summer with my fam we went to tons of museums and there really are loads of awesome art out there that I wanna score a piece of. Degas was my favorite artist after much deliberation. Monet and Van Gogh were runner ups for sure, but I thought Degas would look rad in my new (fictional, remember) house.
Maybe that's why I wanna be an art major? Not to copy cat the greats or anything, but to somehow recreate their creations after being jumbled in my mind and then redistributed to something resembling art. Eh, who knows, maybe someone will be itchin' for some of my art someday... I can only hope. Till then, I'll settle for someone else's.
When I was in Europe last summer with my fam we went to tons of museums and there really are loads of awesome art out there that I wanna score a piece of. Degas was my favorite artist after much deliberation. Monet and Van Gogh were runner ups for sure, but I thought Degas would look rad in my new (fictional, remember) house.
Maybe that's why I wanna be an art major? Not to copy cat the greats or anything, but to somehow recreate their creations after being jumbled in my mind and then redistributed to something resembling art. Eh, who knows, maybe someone will be itchin' for some of my art someday... I can only hope. Till then, I'll settle for someone else's.
Monday, July 14, 2008
Oh shoot, what am I doing with my life?
Yuck. Why am I so decisive when it comes to a pair of shoes or a movie, but when it comes to major life choices...I'm absolutely awful! It's because I like to think I'm waaay smart about my decisions that don't mean anything, to cover up my serious life decision making skills. Yeah, I know, no bueno.
Where does all this decision evaluation come from? I'm switching my major, again, but instead of from undeclared to Biblical Studies, its from Biblical Studies to undeclared...tricky huh? The more I think about being a Bible major the more I find myself saying "really? really...wait really?" And that's never a good sign with me because that usually means I did something silly.
I think I chose to major in Bible because I love the Lord, the Bible and want to share that with others, but first be educated to do so. But the truth is, I know I am going to have that same passion regardless of what profession I choose, so why spend thousands of dollars on something I am already planning and wanting to do, instead of learning an actual skill that I can use to glorify God.
So what do I plan to do now, you ask? Well, good question... I don't really know. Art my be an option, Journalism may be an option, shoot Psych may even be an option. The truth is, I really don't know where I'm going, and I think I like it that way.
Where does all this decision evaluation come from? I'm switching my major, again, but instead of from undeclared to Biblical Studies, its from Biblical Studies to undeclared...tricky huh? The more I think about being a Bible major the more I find myself saying "really? really...wait really?" And that's never a good sign with me because that usually means I did something silly.
I think I chose to major in Bible because I love the Lord, the Bible and want to share that with others, but first be educated to do so. But the truth is, I know I am going to have that same passion regardless of what profession I choose, so why spend thousands of dollars on something I am already planning and wanting to do, instead of learning an actual skill that I can use to glorify God.
So what do I plan to do now, you ask? Well, good question... I don't really know. Art my be an option, Journalism may be an option, shoot Psych may even be an option. The truth is, I really don't know where I'm going, and I think I like it that way.
Monday, June 30, 2008
Sono imparare l'italiano.
(Above is a little bit of Venice, Italy my FAVORITE city in the world!)
It's true, I'm learning Italian. My mom is fluent and awesome because she lived in Italy for 11 years while she was growing up, and still teaches Italian classes, you should take her class... I am! haha.It's pretty ridiculous I have lived all these years without knowing Italian. My brother and sister both spent a year abroad in Florence, Italy in college so they still remember a bit. My grandparents are mostly fluent as well...as you can see I am waaaay behind the norm in this fam.
So, I'm learning Italian this summer so that when I go back to Italy (eventually) I will be able to speak with the greatest of ease, and in the mean time, it's just a beautiful language that I am eager to learn!
All I can really speak at this point are things like, where are you going? What's your name? Where are you from? and I would like a small gelato, please! (Ok, that one really happened in Italy, but still I know how to say it, haha)
Oh, just you wait, I'll be rattling off Italian lingo in no time!
Sunday, June 29, 2008
thunderstorms...yes, please!
Ok, so who doesn't love a good thunderstorm? It's entertaining to watch something so powerful look so awesome at the same time. And if they are summer storms, like the one today, they're even better. I mean really, it's pretty rad when its still a solid 100 degrees outside and raining and storming like a beast. We have a lavender plant in front of my house, and I could smell it before I even made it to the front door, all that heat and water made it fume, it was glorious.
It's weird, I think I'm a big fan of things that are a little bit backwards. I've discovered a trend in my own behavior and tastes that I enjoy things that are just a little bit off. Like crazy summer thunderstorms, eating soup on a hot day, wearing flip flops in the snow, eating cereal for dinner and cold pizza for breakfast, reading only portions of different books simultaneously and never finishing them, and for some reason not really anxious to see how any of them end. It's weird, I almost find ways to make things a little backwards, just to kind of make it my own. I realize now that these are silly examples, but eh....what does it matter?
It's weird, I think I'm a big fan of things that are a little bit backwards. I've discovered a trend in my own behavior and tastes that I enjoy things that are just a little bit off. Like crazy summer thunderstorms, eating soup on a hot day, wearing flip flops in the snow, eating cereal for dinner and cold pizza for breakfast, reading only portions of different books simultaneously and never finishing them, and for some reason not really anxious to see how any of them end. It's weird, I almost find ways to make things a little backwards, just to kind of make it my own. I realize now that these are silly examples, but eh....what does it matter?
Friday, June 27, 2008
why do i keep waiting? i know i'm not patient...
The sky glows
I see it shining when my eyes close
I hear your warnings but we both know
I'm gonna look at it again
Don't wait, don't wait
The road is now a sudden sea
And suddenly, you're deep enough
To lay your armor down
To lay your armor down
To lay your armor down
...
The lights will flash and fade away,
The days will pass you by
Don't wait
I know what you are thinking, but I am not a poet. However, my beloved Chris Carrabba (Dashboard Confessional) is indeed.I see it shining when my eyes close
I hear your warnings but we both know
I'm gonna look at it again
Don't wait, don't wait
The road is now a sudden sea
And suddenly, you're deep enough
To lay your armor down
To lay your armor down
To lay your armor down
...
The lights will flash and fade away,
The days will pass you by
Don't wait
I've been thinking lately about my constant mindset of waiting. I keep thinking that my life will start at a certain point, and that is the time when I will start living passionately. For some reason, the trigger hasn't gone off in my mind that I am ready to start living and stop waiting.
It's crazy, because I keep thinking, "Oh, well when I start high school, when summer comes, when I go to college, when I meet that guy, when I get married, when I have kids...THAT is when I'll start living, that is when my life means something, and that is when I will truly live."
I realize this quite often, and am puzzled by my own inclination to hold back and wait for a major event in life to kick into high gear and really live the way I know I can, and want to.
While I was getting ready this morning and listening to the melodious musical stylings of Mr. Carrabba, a daily routine...I noticed once again that I am waiting. It seriously confuses me (which is silly and means I am confusing myself, whole other issue) and I am so torn as to why I continue to hold back.
The phrase, "To lay your armor down" hit me differently today. Am I putting up some sort of armor that keeps me from living the life I desire? Is there some kind of weird barrier that I keep trying to get past but can't seem to? And then at the end of the song, "The lights will flash and fade away, the days will pass you by, don't wait."
I recently had a birthday, 19 woo hoo! Not really, most things are still illegal for me to participate in and the only milestone for me to cross now is the last year of being a teenager. Something interesting happened this birthday, I didn't feel inspired to start living. I didn't feel that sense of holding back and the need to just get out there and do something. It was strange, and I didn't really know what to make of the whole thing. For some reason, that little thing called waiting...isn't really a part of me anymore. I'm ready to live my life, which sounds more dramatic than I actually mean it to, but you get the idea.
Moral of the story = listening to Dashboard will most likely result in major life changes.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
blogging, indeed.
Well, here we are or here I am...blogging. I'm pretty sure that in the back of my mind I've always wanted to, but didn't want to turn into one of those bloggers who writes pure sillyness like everything they had to eat that day and the most intimate details of their life at every given moment.
So, I will try my best to not become the blogging stereotype that I dislike and instead will share with you my life so far, or at least the cool parts that I feel comfortable enough sharing with you and all of cyberspace.
You should know that I tend to have word vomit, I never really stop talking even when I'm not saying anything my mind still reeling. The benefit of you reading my thoughts before they actually get formulated into speech, is that I won't talk too fast so that you can't understand me and I have to repeat myself or start over because my tongue couldn't keep up wth my brain. My fingers will do the walking and you will be thankful, I'm sure.
Welp, cheers to blogging.
So, I will try my best to not become the blogging stereotype that I dislike and instead will share with you my life so far, or at least the cool parts that I feel comfortable enough sharing with you and all of cyberspace.
You should know that I tend to have word vomit, I never really stop talking even when I'm not saying anything my mind still reeling. The benefit of you reading my thoughts before they actually get formulated into speech, is that I won't talk too fast so that you can't understand me and I have to repeat myself or start over because my tongue couldn't keep up wth my brain. My fingers will do the walking and you will be thankful, I'm sure.
Welp, cheers to blogging.
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